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Where Are All the Women?

“Why does everybody think that women are debasing themselves when we expose the conditions of our debasement? Why do women always have to come off clean?” —Chris Kraus, I Love Dick “So Lidia, why is...

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Reasons to Fuck a Guy on the First Date

To fuck or not to fuck? I feel like that’s the eternal question among girls, or at least among the neurotic “looking for love” ladies that I associate with (luv u galz!). The consequences of fucking a...

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How Was Your Weekend?: Fat Tony

Fresh of the back of a massive Noisey party in New York, Fat Tony talks to us about rousing crowds and wearing multiple pairs of jeans.

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Ketel One Vodka: A Toast to Corbin Clay for Answering a Gentlemen's Call -...

In the end, there could only be one, Corbin Clay. Watch the full-length episode here.

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Ketel One Vodka: A Toast to Corbin Clay for Answering a Gentlemen's Call

A Gentleman’s Call was a celebration of creativity, ingenuity, and above all, ideas. A call to those with the same passion and conviction that Ketel One Vodka was built upon by the Nolet family. A...

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A Porn Story: My Weekend Behind the Scenes at the AVN Awards (Part One)

I’m sitting in the hotel room of one of America’s biggest adult-movie stars, Jesse Jane. It’s time for Jesse to get her makeup done before she heads downstairs into the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in...

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Tubesteak: Are You a Slut?

How many nights have you lain awake in some stranger’s bed while he (or she) dreams next to you? How many times have you stared up at an unfamiliar ceiling and thought, Wow, am I a slut? Do people...

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LA Cop Christopher Dorner Is Not the First American to Be Hunted by Drones on...

  For all we know, it could be happening right now--high above the pine line a robot hovers, looking down. On suspicions that at-large cop vigilante Christopher Dorner is holed up east of Los Angeles...

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The Biggest Mammal Victim of the Wildlife Trade is the Adorable, Endangered...

The plight of tigers, elephants, and rhinoceroses have all received a lot of attention in the press in recent years, as all have become increasingly threatened by the world wildlife trade. But the...

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Comics: Nick Gazin's Comic Book Love-In #81

Dear Funny Bookers,   How are you? I am fine.       If you read silver age DC comics there are these comic-style ads for monster model kits in which a mad scientist, an Igor-style minion, and a...

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Weediquette - Stoner Fashion Decisions

Fashion week happens year round in major cities around the world, but in New York, it doesn’t just happen. It descends upon us. During these times, I tend to avoid the hoopla of celebrity DJs and...

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My Walkout Song - Action Bronson

The walkout song is a time-honored tradition in MMA. It's also a delicate balancing act. The perfect song has to pump a fighter up while settling his/her nerves, appeal to the crowd without appearing...

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Dogmageddon: Art Imitates Life, Then Gets You Killed by Fanatics

The most harrowing moment in Zero Dark Thirty isn't the out-of-nowhere suicide explosions, the torture sequences, or even the night-vision-laden raid on bin Laden's compound. Instead, it comes about...

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Gavin Haynes's Sleepless Nights: Why I Feel Sorry for the Pope Who Hung Up on...

They had to carry the last guy out of there in a box. Three boxes, in fact. One of the many perks of being pope is the way that they don't simply bury you in one coffin. You get three: your body...

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May Streetwear Keep You Forever Young

Mikhail Bortnik, the founder of the revered fashion brand Mishka, lives on a quaint street in Greenpoint, Brooklyn—a neighborhood that used to be full of Polish immigrants and is now most famous for...

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We Saw This: Swans

I had originally bought my ticket to see Swans for a show on October 29, the night of Hurricane Sandy. I remember that night watching the storm progress waiting for the notice that the show would be...

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Talkin''Bout the Boards: You Look Like Sid Vicious's Autistic Baby

Dear VICE Lovers, You just looooooove to leave comments on the things we put on the internet. I just loooooove to draw cartoons based on your comments. This is my column, "Talkin' 'Bout the Boards,"...

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Aaron Swartz and Bradley Manning: How the US Government Contains Those Who...

“Remember how they outlawed acid soon as they found out it was a channel to something they didn't want us to see? Why should information be any different?” So says paranoid, stoner gumshoe Doc...

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Pen Pals: Incorrect Officers

Some correction officers getting trained in Nebraska in the 50s. Wonder if any of them abused any inmates in their day? Daaamn! Look at this prison guard who’s having a cop killer’s baby after banging...

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Matthew Bellosi Is an Artist Out of Philly Who Makes Tape Covers and Such

Matthew Bellosi is an up-and-coming artist out of Philapelphia. His recent work can be seen adorning the covers of numerous eccentric and intense releases, mostly of the cassette-tape medium, by...

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